Alex Hoffer

Trust Your Gut and Take Your Shot

Personal Growth

A couple of months ago, I played in my local golf club’s member/guest golf invitational. My partner and I were in a tight match on our last hole, a par five. After a good drive, I had about 225 yards left, but the water guarded the green, and the wind blew strongly in my face. My partner and I discussed the pros and cons of going for the green. His shot had put him in relatively good shape, so we determined it was worth the risk for me to go for it. 

That decided, our discussion turned to which club to hit. Two holes prior, I had hit the purest three-iron I had hit in years, reaching a par five in two strokes. I thought if I hit that same shot on this hole, I would carry the green and get into deep trouble. My gut said to opt for a four-iron, but it would have to be a perfect shot. My partner leaned toward a three-iron but encouraged me to go with my gut. 

I pulled the club, took a deep breath, and looked at the target, and my brain filled with thoughts. The previous day on the same hole, I’d hit the worst shot of the season, sending my ball into the water. And a week prior, under different conditions, I’d hit a six-iron that started left of the green before perfectly fading into the middle of it. 

Which memory was I going to fixate on? 

I took another deep breath and another long look at the target. I took my stance and one last look. 

I then executed my best swing of the day. I caught the ball purely and watched it fly directly towards the pin… 

Take Necessary Risks

Someone reading this post is facing a major decision — and if so, this post is for you. The point I am making above is not to take unnecessary risks. In fact, sometimes, in golf, the best play is to lay up — something I should have done the previous day when I was not fully committed to going for the green, leading to my tentative swing and less-than-stellar outcome. 

Sometimes, however, you have to nudge yourself out of your comfort zone and go for it. Sometimes you have to leave the golf course, race home to get the ring and go to her house because you can’t wait a moment longer to get on one knee and ask her to marry you. Sometimes, you have to drop everything and take your child to the activity that you have not had time for. Sometimes you have to fly to Germany on Father’s Day to meet with a potential customer because it will be worth it ten years later. Sometimes you must drive to Evansville to see your Papa because you know there won’t be another chance. 

Hit Your Shot

While you may not have the same experiences as I have, I suspect you can relate to them; in fact, I’d be willing to bet that someone out there is facing something similar right now. 

And if you are, my advice to you is simple: trust your gut, pull out the “club,” and go for it. 

Hit your shot. 

Even if your perfect shot still somehow finds the water like mine did, you will go home realizing you took your shot. 

And there’s no denying that there is something magical, even life-giving, about taking your shot. 

Next Monday, I will share a brief special post on another shot I am taking. 

Until then, take yours. 

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How Change Happens Suddenly, Over Time

Leadership

I was recently reminded of the power of repetition, and how change happens suddenly over time. If the second half of that sentence does not seem to make sense, allow me to explain. 

Working in manufacturing, I make it a point to walk our production floor every day I am in the office. I want to see, know, and connect with the people who make up our team — and the only way to do that is by actually doing that, rather than giving lip service to it. I’ve learned that I simply put on my walking shoes and get moving! 

Repetition Leads to Routine

The first day that you go out and walk the shop floor, nothing will look or feel different. If you’re like me you would see people working across an injection molding facility. They would see you, with many waving or saying hello. It would be a good experience, potentially even an interesting one, but not a transformative one. You might be tempted to think it was not worth the effort. After all, you had to stop whatever it was that you were doing to go walk the production floor. 

Then the next day comes, and again, you would have a choice to make. Did yesterday matter? It probably did not feel like it did. It was nice seeing people, hearing from a few of them, but it was hardly transformational. Should you do it again? You committed to it, so out of pure commitment you do. 

You do the same the next day, and the day after that. A few weeks later, you realize that this is turning into a routine. Since it is part of your routine, you no longer have to be as intentional as you were at the beginning. It simply is part of what you do. 

Routine Leads to Transformation

At some point along the way, you’ll start to realize that the friendly nods and hellos are turning into some occasional conversations. The conversations are the best part. You begin to learn about of the challenges your teammates are facing at work, and occasionally, at home. 

Then one day, if you are like me, you realize that change has happened suddenly over time. This happens when you find yourself having one of those conversations that make the whole day worthwhile. The kind that is both meaningful and transformational. The kind that makes you feel like it was destiny. Sure, your title might be something fancy, but titles are just external descriptors of what you sort of do. Conversations like these, however, are tied to the person you are: A leader who realizes that they can only make things happen with, and through, other people. 

And this only happens through the power of repetition. The reality that each moment matters, and that each moment spent well, leads to transformational change. 

It happens suddenly, but over time. 

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Dealing with Difficult Employees?

Leadership

Many leaders I talk with have shared their frustration over one of their employees not performing as well as they could. They often refer to this problem as the problem of a difficult employee — an employee who isn’t giving them the results they want. 

Often, they place the focus on the problematic employee. The employee isn’t motivated. They are not doing what they are supposed to do. Their work is inconsistent. You get the idea. 

A Different Perspective

What if the difficult employee is not the problem? What if the problem is the leader? 

What if the leader has failed to set clear expectations of what performing well looks like? What if the leader has not regularly communicated their expectations? What if the leader has had many conversations about the difficult employee but never discussed their concerns with the employee in question? 

Blaming others is a lot like indulging in too much sugar. It tastes good going down and even leads to a short-term high, but it inevitably upsets your stomach and leaves you feeling worse. 

To be a real leader, you must own the problems you’ve helped create. And here is the reality: If you have someone on your team that you classify as a problematic employee, you have contributed to it. I’ll allow that you possibly hired the wrong person to begin with, but that is also on you. Or, more likely, there is something about your leadership that is lacking, and you are dealing with the repercussions. 

Been There, Done That

How do I know this? Because I have been there and done that. 

The Hoffer Plastics salesperson who wasn’t performing up to par was never the main problem or root cause. 

I was. 

I sometimes still am. 

How’s that for reality? 

So, where do we go from here? 

We take our medicine by owning it and changing our behavior going forward. 

On the front end, we make sure that we spend a LOT (emphasis needed) of time with potential hires. At Hoffer Plastics, I want to know that these potential teammates (not employees) are humble, hungry, and smart. This means they are team players who think about others more than themselves. They are self-starters. They also have a high emotional quotient (EQ) and know how to interact with others well. This keeps our team moving in sync and avoids inadvertently adding “difficult” folks to our team. 

Occasionally, however, “difficult” still makes it through the interview process. And that is always on me, not the person who made it through. But all is not lost. 

Clear Communication and Expectations

I believe in the power of clear communication and expectations. Sometimes tricky situations occur because communication and expectations are lacking. A Key Results Area (KRA), for example, gives a team member the blueprint for what success in their job entails. It also aligns the leader and employee to what the expectations are.  

There is no perfect way to write a KRA, but it must describe what winning looks like. If that sounds cheesy or too simplistic, then we are on to something. You do not need a Harvard MBA to be a successful leader — you need to be able to communicate clearly enough that a fifth grader can understand what winning looks like. 

Here is an example for a salesperson:

Key Result Area #1: Land new customers in the medical market 

What winning looks like: 

Winning means that we have a new relationship in our fastest-growing market. It will energize our team and bring a level of personal satisfaction for the contribution I have made. It also recognizes that my contribution is just one of many. We are one team. This will take the team working together, so winning will happen with everyone at the finish line together. 

What it will take: 

  • Attendance at MD&M Medical Design & Manufacturing show
  • Handwritten thank you notes to people that stop at our booth 
  • One-on-one, in-person meetings with prospective customers 
  • Learning how to help the customer win and guiding them elsewhere if we can’t help 
  • Quick (within X hours/days) responses to questions and RFQs
  • Gaining commitment when all the above aligns.

The above example clarifies what success looks like and what it will take to be successful. 

The Choice is Yours

Difficulty only arises when the team member is not doing what it takes or is doing things in a way that contradicts the company’s values. When this happens, the leader should produce the KRA and/or company values and honestly discuss them with the employee. 

Coming full circle, the point of this post is to get you to consider what you can do in your leadership to address difficult employees. You have to choose whether you want to keep eating sugar — blaming the difficult employee for everything — and feeling bad in the long run? Or do you want to take your medicine — realizing your contribution to the mess you are observing — and work to fix the problem? 

The latter is a different approach and one that leads the organization back to health. 

Dealing with Difficult Employees? Read More »

Dear Will (2022)

Birthday Post

In commemoration of Will’s 11th birthday on August 16, 2022. 

Dear Will, 

There is a picture from the day you were born that I have often thought about this spring. We’re in the hospital room, and I am holding you with my back to the TV. There’s a Chicago Cubs game on. I think back to that moment and remember imagining the moments that would come…moments like taking you to your first baseball game, Little League, and watching you play ball. This spring, I watched you develop into a leader on your baseball team. You hit, defended, and were the player your coach counted on to pitch when the game was on the line. I think my heart raced at about 150 beats per minute when that happened, but you stayed calm. This amazed me. 

I do not know when you will read these words, so let me clarify my thoughts before going forward. As I told you this spring, I want you to know that I could care less about the results of your athletic progress. These days, there’s too much emphasis on performance, especially when it comes to child athletics. Let me state clearly that my love for you is not conditional. I do not care how well you play golf, baseball, or any other chosen sport. I love you regardless. 

Attitude

My favorite moment of this past baseball season was when you gave up a home run. You had never given up an inside-the-park home run before. The opposing player hit a long pop fly that your right fielder probably should have caught — but instead, the ball dropped and rolled to the fence. It was an instant home run! You brushed it off, shook your head, and had a facial expression that said, “oh well.” 

If you can take that attitude with you whenever life hits an inside-the-park home run on you, it will be incredible to witness the places you will go. I care far more about your mindset and character than your performance. To that end, you amaze me even more! 

Kindness

There is always an example of your kindness to behold. Just this morning, for example, you made your brother breakfast. You were not asked to — you simply did it because you wanted it to be ready for him when he came downstairs. The friendship you two share is also something to behold. My prayer is that friendship only deepens in the years to come. Never lose that friendship. Cling to it. It will be a steadying force in the years to come. 

Meanwhile, your gentleness to Sadie is instructive to me. Mom and I can tell that you are growing up faster than we would like, yet you are willing to go to Sadie’s level to connect with her. It is humbling to watch you be so kind and loving. It reminds me to similarly meet people where they are, appearances be damned. 

As you can tell, the last few years have been hard in many respects. And being your dad has been such a gift to me. That would always have been the case, but in the chaos of the last few years I think I appreciate it more than I would have otherwise. The joy I feel watching a game with you, seeing you before I leave for work, and especially watching you play, is indescribable. It settles my feet on otherwise shaky ground. I hope you read these words years from now and realize the gift your childhood was for me, your dad. They brought light to an otherwise dark time. They gave me life. 

And playing catch with you takes me back to 1980-something when I did not have a care in the world. It was, and is, freeing in a way that nothing else is.  

I love you, son. 

I will always love you. 

Dad.  

Dear Will (2022) Read More »

The Power of Remembering

Personal Growth

Welcome to mid-August and the dog days of summer. If you have lived the year right, this is the time of the year when you wonder whether you can make it through the fall and to the finish line. With this in mind, I want to share the key to renewing your energy. 

Remembering 

This spring, I spent three months studying 1 and 2 Kings in my Bible. These books detail how Israel lost its way by following the ways of culture rather than the Living God. Because of this, it was divided into two nations: Israel and Judah. The rest of the two books describe how kings from both countries mostly failed to live in accordance with the word of God. They failed, in short, because they failed to remember. 

Throughout scripture, there is an emphasis on remembering. This emphasis is there because remembering is core to one’s identity. Scripture encouraged the people of Israel to remember whose they were. As God’s chosen people, they were set apart to live differently than others around them. Life worked when they did, but it never did when they did not. 

Looking Inward 

Shifting from scripture to our lives, how do you feel right now? If you’re like many of us, you may be feeling a bit run down. If that’s you, let me ask you this: what if we focused on remembering? 

Take a few moments to consider these prompts: 

What is it about your work that makes you smile? 

What purpose does your work fulfill in the community around you? 

Slow down and consider this. 

Just to get you started, I’ll go first. I was having a rough week last week from an energy standpoint. Then I went out on our production floor and engaged with a few friends. I guess I could call them employees, but that feels (and sounds) too impersonal. They are friends. They lifted me up. They made me smile. I renewed my energy by spending time with them and renewed my energy again by remembering them and our interaction. 

More prompts: 

Remember the moment when you stood at the altar? For me, it was when the doors opened, and Sarah appeared in that white dress. Fifteen years and counting, but I still go back to that moment. The life God has given us since then is, to quote my sophomore speech back at Purdue, “blessed beyond belief.” 

Remember that moment when you first looked into your son or daughter’s eyes? The gates of hell could not stand against you at that moment. All of life changed in that instant. You were never more alive. Can you recall it? Do you still feel it? I often go back to this moment, especially when my kids are being kids. If you have ever been a parent, you know what I mean by that statement! 

Remembering

We live in a world where everyone wants more vacation time and more time off work. I am not against any of this. But I have discovered that for me, vacation and time off work often don’t lead to the renewal I am seeking. Many times, I am more tired after my vacation than I am after work! That means I may return to work feeling depressed and drained. 

But focusing on remembering allows me to reorient my soul. Suddenly, I feel headed back on track to what matters. The wind shifts from my face to my back. My steps feel purposeful. I am rejuvenated with the knowledge that I can keep going. All because I remembered. 

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Dear Sadie (2022)

Birthday Post

A few years ago, I started posting a letter to my late grandfather on his birthday. I’ve found it to be a great way to remember and honor him — but I’ll admit that I wish I could tell him the things I write in my letter or that he could at least read it himself. It is this feeling of longing that drove me to start writing and posting birthday letters to my three kids. I plan on writing this blog for years to come, so my hope is that they will be able to come here and read them over time. 

Why am I sharing these letters in such a public way? Because I hope they will have value to you as a reader. As you read these, I invite you to remember what you love about those closest to you. If you are a parent, consider writing your kids their own birthday letter. The letter-writing process will help you remember what you love about them. And let that love overflow to how you lead other human beings. You cannot give what you do not possess. So let the power of remembering (I’ll talk more on this next week) increase your love and positively impact your leadership.  

Here is my letter to Sadie… 

Dear Sadie, 

Joy entered my world on August 2, 2016. Let me be clear that joy existed before this day. In fact, as we often talk about at home, true Joy can only be found in Jesus. I know this sounds dumbfounding to those who do not know Jesus, but there is no better love. Indescribable love gives birth to the truest Joy on the planet, for it is worth everything.   

But your arrival was an added dimension to the joy I had previously known. Like the first sights of faith, an entirely new world was opened up to me. Suddenly, I could see new colors — often pink and purple! And wow, those colors are beautiful! It was, and is, amazing. Since then, each day spans the spectrum of the rainbow.  

As you turn six, I already see characteristics developing that will shape the adult person you will become. You are determined. I call you “Momma Jean” as you dole out demands to your two older brothers. They comply out of love and because you are someone they want to follow. They want to follow you because the only human love I have seen matched is from your mom, my wife! There are moments when I see your love in action and gasp, realizing this is what your mom must have been like at your age. It is like I can see into the past with more clarity now. All because you are amazing, just like your mom. 

One thing of note before I go forward: You are amazing simply because you exist. You have a God-purchased amazing identity. This is not contingent on what you do or don’t do. If your eyes see this down the road when life is hard — and life always gets hard — realize that your identity is amazing because of Whose you are, not because of what you do. The same for me. The same for mom. The same for everyone. 

If there is anything better than a “Sadie hug” on this side of heaven, I have not found it. Those hugs are the most life-giving hugs on the planet. They change something deep inside my soul, offering reassurance that things can be good again. And they often lead to you calling for “family hugs.” The boys roll their eyes and typically flee the room, but it is their loss. I will take hugs from your mom and you every single day! 

I will end with remembering our family room dances, always initiated by you. Twirling you, hearing your infectious laughter, and seeing that smile only mom can rival, are the things that make life precious. I find myself wishing these moments would never end.  

My love for you only grows and grows. 

While I excitedly anticipate the adult you will inevitably become, something tells me that I will one day mentally go back to this time right now. A time when you are a little girl with an outstretched hand, twirling, dancing, and falling into my embrace. 

There is nothing better. There will never be anything better. 

I love you. Happy 6th birthday, my special little girl.

Dad 

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Loving Yourself

Leadership

Last week I asked the question, “Do you love others enough to admit when you are wrong?” 

Answering this question positively helps a leader become someone worth following. It also helps them do things with and through other people, which is the process of leadership. 

This week’s question provides similar benefits if we take it seriously. It is: 

Do you love yourself enough to find out what you do not want to know about yourself? 

If this feels uncomfortable, that’s okay — it’s supposed to. And to get the most out of the answer, it makes sense to first address the second part of the question: what DON’T you want to know about yourself? 

For me, it runs the gamut:

  • I don’t want to know what irritates other people at work 
  • I don’t want to know my blind spots 
  • I don’t want to know the specific things I say and do that annoy Sarah
  • I don’t want to know what annoys my kids — especially once they become teenagers and are experts on everything! 

Do You Want Feedback or Feedback Lite?

As I read what I’ve written above, I can sense some of you saying, “Not me. I really want to know those things!”  If that’s the case, that’s great! Either you’re more mature than I am and actually want to know ALL of that, or you know that saying you want to know that stuff is the right thing to say. 

But most of us (me included) say that we want feedback, but what we mean is something more along the lines of feedback lite. In other words, “I want to know all the things that I ALREADY know about myself, and maybe one or two things other that are not too offensive. But, definitely not everything.”  

How can I tell I don’t want to hear the above items? Because I react poorly when they are unsolicitedly shared with me. Or am I the only one who doesn’t handle it well when my wife points out one of my faults on a day when I’m tired, and work was a beast? 

Seriously, am I the only one that handles that poorly? 

Getting Feedback to Get Better

If I really love myself, I want to get better. This involves hearing things about myself that I do not want to hear — even when the feedback comes when I haven’t asked for it. 

I like simple ideas, so here is one to start the process of hearing things you do not want to hear about yourself: 

  • Share the topic of this post — that you need to hear things about yourself that you probably do not want to hear so that you can improve as a person. 
  • Guarantee that there will be no repercussions or fallout (and stick to it!)
  • Ask that they be gentle but uncomfortably honest. 
  • Then ask, “How am I doing as your [fill in the blank]? What can I do better?”

Who should you ask? Here’s a list to get you started:

  • Coworker 
  • Boss 
  • Direct report 
  • Spouse (or best friend)
  • Child(ren) / another family member 

These people will unlock insights about you that will help you become a better person. 

They Call it the “Painful” Truth for a Reason

Learning this about yourself may not feel good in the moment, but it is the actual loving thing to do. I say this with confidence because it will change you for the better. 

Before closing, I want to remind you that it’s crucial to analyze and interpret the feedback you receive — someone’s opinion of you is not gospel, it’s just their opinion. Listen to what they share and find the truth behind it. 

Leaning into what you do not want to hear is admittedly not fun. It is often painful. But it is also often the place where transformation begins. 

If you want what is best for yourself, seek out what you do not want to hear about yourself. You will become a better person and, by default, a better leader. 

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Loving Others

Leadership

Leadership is the process of doing things with and through other people. But how can you ensure you’re the most effective leader you can be? Over the next two weeks, I will ask you two simple questions that will require you to reflect on your leadership. 

This week’s question is:

Do you love others enough to admit when you are wrong? 

Think about it this way: when was the last time you… 

  • Confessed a wrongdoing to a team member? 
  • Admitted you were wrong to your spouse? 
  • Told one of your children you had made a mistake?
  • Apologized to a friend because of an error you made or a misunderstanding you caused? 

The Remarkableness of Owning Up to Our Mistakes

I recently browsed through social media and found a remarkable post from a politician. It read: 

The other day, I voiced my strong belief about one of the day’s prevailing issues — you can YouTube the talk to see exactly what I am referring to. Unfortunately, I used divisive rhetoric. Instead of sticking to the issue at hand, I insulted a few opposing party members. I was absolutely wrong in doing so. I apologize for this. In the future, I will stick to the issue and not criticize others personally.

Do you know who said this? 

Neither do I because I just made it up. 

Wouldn’t it be amazing if a politician did this? You might not even agree with their stance on whatever the “prevailing” issue of the day is, but you would at least respect them. More to the point, you would sense that they (actually) do care for people, rather than just giving them lip service. 

Why “Loving” Leaders Admit Fault

Let’s stop picking on politicians and personalize this: 

  • Are we the kind of people that admit when we are wrong? 
  • Am I the kind of person that admits when I am wrong? 

I’d like to suggest that when we are loving, we are willing to admit that we’re wrong. And here’s what I mean: Loving is an action. It says, “I care for you so much that I am going to admit that I am wrong, even when I do not feel like doing so.” 

When I’m loving, I’m driven to:

  • Apologize to my executive admin when my tone is too direct — something I just did before writing this post! 
  • Admit to our sales leader that my idea isn’t the best one. 
  • Apologize to Sarah when I come home grumpy and bring the whole house’s energy down to my negative level. Ugh! 
  • Apologize to my kids when my tone is too aggressive, when I say a bad word while watching a football game, or any other foolish thing I do. 

It May Not Be the Easy Thing, But It’s the Loving Thing

When do I feel like apologizing? 

I hate to confess this, but mostly never. 

But I do it because it is the loving thing to do. 

Do you love others enough to admit when you are wrong? 

My hunch is that our society would be better if more of us did this. 

I guarantee you will be worth following when you do. 

I can say this with confidence because I will follow your lead! 

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The Power of Silence and Repentance

Personal Growth

The nature of my personality is such that I often write these blog posts several weeks, or in this case, almost two months in advance. This is because I like to build in slack for vacations, holidays, and rest. I share this at the outset of today’s post because my thoughts currently are on the (now) recent tragic shootings in Buffalo, New York, and Uvalde, Texas.

One of the things that have struck me this past week is how quickly leaders have jumped to potential solutions for how we have gotten to where we are. What follows are not solutions but a potential path forward for leaders to think about and care for those they lead. 

Be Silent

As a refresher, I believe leadership is the process of doing things with and through other people. This requires influence. Used positively, influence makes someone worth following. Without followers, you are not a leader. 

One concern I have about political leadership is that we don’t allow folks time to think before they speak. Instead, we expect them to make immediate statements — and they are often reactionary and emotional, occasionally harmful, and usually divisive. 

As counterintuitive as this may sound, silence allows one to process. Deep thinking is power. From a political leadership standpoint, it is socially unacceptable to be silent in a 24/7 news cycle. But this is one of the reasons our words are so weak and un-transformational.  

Silence allows us to consider the gravity of what has happened. It forces us to think past simplistic solutions. It forces us to deal with grief, lamentation, and sadness. It forces us to be human in the truest sense of the word. 

Leaders, if we are to positively influence and work with others who see the world differently than we do, we must approach situations from the depths that only silence can provide. Only by taking a moment to be silent can we get in touch with what is happening inside us. Only silence can introduce us to what we think, feel, or believe. 

Repent

I am tempted to use a different word here because “repent” might be viewed negatively given its religious connotations, but no better word applies. 

Repent simply means to turn around. In the Christian sense, it means that we are walking in the wrong direction, so it is time to turn around and walk towards Christ. 

Please hear me when I say I am walking in the wrong direction. 

This is not some attempt to “humble brag” but a true confession, an admission that I am walking in the wrong direction. In a world this divisive, this violent, this tragic? I ask for forgiveness for every useless, angry, and prideful thing I have said. Forgive me for what I have failed to do out of convenience to myself. Forgive me for how I failed to lead, and worse, failed to love. 

I realize that I have a long way to go. And I desperately need my Savior. Any conversation about “where do we go from here” has to start with the knowledge that I am part of the problem. Anything that points to “them,” “that group,” or “those people” is not going to change anything. The only person I can change, with God’s help, is myself. 

Live Life

Jesus said he came to give us life, life to the full (John 10:10). 

Jesus also said that in this world there would be trouble (John 16:33). 

If you know anything about Jesus, you know that he was arrested, beaten, and crucified. God’s perfect son faced humanity’s wrath and alienation from his Father. 

I point the above out because when tragic events happen, some doubt the goodness of God. This is fair. In fact, if that is you, I would invite you to read deeply of his Word and seek what God’s Word (not commentators, pastors, or anyone else for that matter, especially me!) has to say about suffering, sin, and love. I am not here to proselytize, only share. To that end, and only that end, I have discovered that Jesus’ words above are the Truth. 

Given the Truth that I follow, I mourn with those who mourn and rejoice with those who rejoice. Last week I drove 90 minutes to the city to attend a wake for one of our team members who lost their father. The next day, I celebrated another team member at their retirement party, thanking them for their 30+ years of service. This duality is life. 

This world is full of trouble and grief. It is also full of laughter, love, and joy. In the middle, we (at Hoffer Plastics) are to do meaningful work by manufacturing plastic parts that contribute to the livelihoods of millions. All this is life. 

To this end, I will close with a gentle admonition. To be someone worth following, we have to be the kind of people who unite rather than those who divide. To this end, I put forth what I have mentioned above. 

“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins” (1 Peter 4:8). 

We cannot give what we do not possess. 

I am loved greatly because I have sinned greatly. 

I am part of the problem. 

When I love others, I am part of the solution. 

Thanks be to God for his love that allows me to love. 

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Dear Papa

Special Post

Over the past few years, I’ve written a letter to my Grandpa Hoffer around the date of his birthday. It occurred to me that my other grandfather, Papa, has also significantly impacted my life. What follows is a letter to my mom’s dad, my Papa. I include it on the blog this week because his birthday, July 5th, is smack dab in the middle of summer, and summer is often a time when leaders slow down and take stock. 

I hope this letter encourages you to remember your past. How has it shaped who you have become today? And how can you honor your past in your leadership going forward? Above all else, I hope “remembering” recharges you as it has for me. 

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Dear Papa, 

I’ve spent the last few weeks thinking about what I might write to you. To start with, I miss you. Since you passed in 2005, my life has changed in so many ways — it feels like a lifetime ago. Yet, when I think back to our time together, the days of yesteryear are precariously close. The only plausible explanation for this feeling is that my fondness for those days goes deep. Those days shaped the man I have become. 

When I look at my three kids, I can’t help but think how much you would love them! I imagine you watching baseball late at night with Will and me. He has somehow inherited your love for sitting quietly and watching baseball. I‘ve told him (more times than I can count) that he has inherited this love from you. Like you, he is willing to put team allegiances aside to celebrate good baseball. I have also told him that you were the only person I knew who saw Babe Ruth play in person. His eyes always grow wide in amazement. 

Meanwhile, Ben eats like you — which means he eats everything, something I’m sure you’d be proud of. I have taken him to a few Cubs games this year, and he has demolished the buffet in our seating area! Ben has such a curiosity for life that I am sure he would tire you out with questions. He specifically wonders about your war experience. You would appreciate the gentleness of his soul. 

Sadie is something else entirely. She is tough, sweet, and a princess — all in a matter of minutes. As you would be able to tell quickly, there is a reason her middle name is Jean. In fact, I call her “Momma Jean” when she is barking orders at her older brothers. But most of all, you would love her hugs. There’s nothing like them on this planet. 

As the years have rolled on, I have always remembered our long Evansville summer days, with their oppressive heat and occasional thunderstorms. I am reminded of lunches we had at Don Mattingly’s restaurant, followed by our movie of choice at the theatre next door. I cannot remember many of the films we saw, but I always felt like those days were the best. Especially when we somehow got to sit inside the boxing ring at Don Mattingly’s! 

I recently gave the boys some of my old Don Mattingly baseball cards. I cannot describe how much I missed you at that moment. 

I’ll never forget one of the last serious conversations we had in your garage. It was the summer of 2004, and I was trying to figure out what to do with my life. You patiently listened to me as you smoked your pipe. I went on and on about all the potential paths I could go down, and I asked you what I should do. You just looked at me and said something along the lines of, “Ah, I am sure you will figure it out. Work hard, and your parents will be proud.” I was admittedly annoyed that you did not give me any kind of concrete guidance. But now, all these years later, I realize the wisdom in what you said. Sometimes the simple approach of working hard clears the path to which path is best. You knew that a person’s identity isn’t found in a particular path but in the ethics of the person on that path. 

Your identity will always be Papa to me. You were steady, consistent, loving, and fun.  

What I would do to have one more dinner at Evansville Country Club with JJ, you, and Sarah. 

Oh, how you would enjoy meeting Sarah. 

I miss you. 

Love, 

Alex

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